As more and more single mothers start re-entering the dating arena, there are some tricky situations to maneuver through. These can be mothers that are either divorced or those that are single because they chose to be. For these women, dating can involve some pretty large hoops to jump through unless you’ve got live in help or a relative that just loves to babysit your kids for you. Actually, babysitting is just the tip of the iceberg when it comes to coordinating all of the things that need to be taken care of before you can enjoy a night out on the town with a date.
However, in spite of all the preparation for a date, single women continue to have a very successful social life that also includes dating.
The first thing to remember is that any man who may be around your children at any point in time is someone that you need to be very sure about. You need to be certain that he’s safe and that he doesn’t have any sort of criminal history. It’s also a good idea to find out how he feels about kids before you start dating him. All of these things are very important and should be thoroughly checked into before ever going out on that first date. The last thing you want is to bring someone into your life and that of your children who has a less than stellar background.
A problem that many single moms face when dating is dealing with a child that doesn’t want to share their mom with someone new. Now, obviously, you don’t want to upset your child that may already be dealing with the fallout from a divorce or death of a father. However, you do need to set some clear boundaries. It’s important for your child to understand that you’re more than just a mom and that you deserve to have some privacy of your own to get out and have some adult fun. You need to explain that you’ll always be there for them, but that there’s also a part of your life that belongs only to you. If all else fails and these problems escalate, you probably want to consider having your child speak with a counselor.
Last, but not least, if it begins to look as if a certain relationship may be heading down a path to something more permanent, start incorporating your child into your dating life. Once you feel that someone may become a serious part of your life, he needs to spend some time with your child so that they can become better acquainted. This needs to be done well ahead of time before making any such serious decisions as moving in together or getting married. If your child and your man get along well, the transition will be so much easier because they will have had time to get to know one another and won’t be strangers.
As you can see, it’s much simpler to adjust to dating life as a single mom than you may have ever thought it would be.